Keegan, the Toilet and The Reason England Fans Should Cherish The Current Period

Commonplace Lavatory Laughs

Toilet humor has long been the safe haven of your Daily, and we are always mindful to significant toilet tales and milestones, particularly within football. Readers were entertained to discover that an online journalist a famous broadcaster possesses a urinal decorated with West Brom motifs at his home. Consider the situation about the Tykes follower who understood the bathroom somewhat too seriously, and needed rescuing from the vacant Barnsley ground post-napping in the lavatory midway through a 2015 losing match by Fleetwood. “He had no shoes on and had lost his mobile phone and his cap,” stated an official from the local fire department. And everyone remembers at the pinnacle of his career at Manchester City, Mario Balotelli visited a nearby college for toilet purposes in 2012. “Balotelli parked his Bentley outside, then came in and was asking the location of the toilets, subsequently he entered the faculty room,” a student told a Manchester newspaper. “After that he was just walking around the college grounds acting like the owner.”

The Toilet Resignation

This Tuesday commemorates a quarter-century to the day that Kevin Keegan resigned from the England national team post a quick discussion inside a lavatory booth together with Football Association official David Davies deep within Wembley Stadium, after the notorious 1-0 loss against Germany in 2000 – the national team's concluding fixture at the legendary venue. As Davies remembers in his diary, his confidential FA records, he stepped into the wet struggling national team changing area right after the game, discovering David Beckham crying and Tony Adams motivated, both of them pleading for the official to reason with Keegan. Following Dietmar Hamann’s free-kick, Keegan moved wearily along the passageway with a thousand-yard stare, and Davies discovered him collapsed – just as he was at Anfield in 1996 – in the corner of the dressing room, whispering: “I'm done. I can't handle this.” Collaring Keegan, Davies attempted urgently to salvage the situation.

“Where on earth could we find for a private conversation?” remembered Davies. “The tunnel? Full of TV journalists. The changing area? Crowded with emotional footballers. The bathing section? I couldn't conduct an important discussion with the team manager as squad members entered the baths. Merely one possibility emerged. The toilet cubicles. A dramatic moment in England’s long football history took place in the vintage restrooms of a stadium facing demolition. The impending destruction could almost be smelled in the air. Dragging Kevin into a cubicle, I secured the door behind us. We stayed there, eye to eye. ‘My decision is final,’ Kevin declared. ‘I’m out of here. I’m not up to it. I’m going out to the press to tell them I’m not up to it. I'm unable to energize the team. I can't extract the additional effort from these athletes that's required.’”

The Consequences

Consequently, Keegan quit, eventually revealing he viewed his stint as England manager “without spirit”. The two-time Ballon d’Or winner added: “I struggled to occupy my time. I found myself going and training the blind team, the deaf team, working with the ladies team. It's a tremendously tough role.” The English game has progressed significantly during the last 25 years. For better or worse, those stadium lavatories and those iconic towers are no longer present, whereas a German currently occupies in the technical area Keegan previously used. The German's squad is viewed as one of the contenders for next year's international tournament: Three Lions supporters, appreciate this period. This particular anniversary from one of the Three Lions’ darkest days is a reminder that things were not always so comfortable.

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Quote of the Day

“We stood there in a lengthy line, clad merely in our briefs. We were Europe’s best referees, elite athletes, role models, grown-ups, parents, determined individuals with strong principles … however all remained silent. We scarcely made eye contact, our eyes shifted somewhat anxiously while we were called forward two by two. There Collina observed us from top to bottom with a freezing stare. Mute and attentive” – previous global referee Jonas Eriksson reveals the humiliating procedures match officials were formerly exposed to by former Uefa head of referees Pierluigi Collina.

Football Daily Letters

“How important is a name? There’s a poem by Dr Seuss named ‘Too Many Daves’. Did Blackpool encounter Steve Overload? Steve Bruce, together with staff Steve Agnew and Steve Clemence have been dismissed through the exit. Is this the termination of the Steve fascination? Not quite! Steve Banks and Steve Dobbie remain to manage the main squad. Complete Steve forward!” – John Myles

“Now that you've relaxed spending restrictions and awarded some merch, I've chosen to type and make a pithy comment. Ange Postecoglou claims he started conflicts on the school grounds with children he knew would beat him up. This masochistic tendency must account for his option to move to Nottingham Forest. As a lifelong Spurs supporter I'll continue appreciating the subsequent season award however the sole second-year prize I envision him securing by the Trent, if he lasts that long, is the second division and that would be quite a challenge {under the present owner” – Stewart McGuinness.|